Emotional Resolution with Cedric Bertelli

Where do emotions come from? What happens in the brain during high stress and anxiety? Why is feeling your negative emotions the key to reducing their intensity and frequency?

In this podcast episode, Billy and Brandy Eldridge speak about emotional resolution with Cedric Bertelli.

Meet Cedric Bertelli

A photo of Cedric Bertelli is captured. He is the Founder and Director of the Emotional Health Institute. Cedric is featured on The Beta Male Revolution Podcast.

Cedric Bertelli is the Founder and Director of the Emotional Health Institute. He began his studies around the understanding of emotional functioning in 2009 in France and has continued his work in the United States since 2011.

In collaboration with several other professionals, he developed the Emotional Resolution™ method (or EmRes™), which is designed to permanently release disruptive emotional patterns within minutes.

In addition to working with clients individually, Cedric trains mental health professionals and educators across the United States on Emotional Resolution.

Visit the Emotional Health Institute and connect with them on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Youtube.

Visit Cedric Bertelli’s website and connect with him on Instagram.

In This Podcast

Summary

  • What are emotions?
  • What happens in the brain during high stress?
  • Why must you feel your emotions?

What are emotions?

Emotional difficulty and emotions in general … are obsolete predictions from the brain. An emotion that keeps on coming back is a prediction from the brain. (Cedric Bertelli)

In life, people have experiences, and the brain uses those experiences to update its predictions about the future. That is what learning is.

In this sense, an emotional difficulty is a prediction from the brain that has not yet been updated. The brain is having the same emotional response to different situations.

How does one update a “stuck” prediction?

We know today that at the origin of every single one of our disruptive emotional patterns [such as] depression, anxiety, anger, stress … is a [similar] event. It is always a moment of very high stress, like trauma. (Cedric Bertelli)

Some things that are traumatic for babies and children are not traumatic for adults, but trauma experienced as a child can follow someone’s development into adulthood if it is not resolved.

What happens in the brain during high stress?

When the body cannot handle the amount of stress in a moment, there is a short period of disassociation. In other words, a cognitive shutdown.

What you and I are aware of consciously [and] cognitively would represent about 2000 bits of data and information per second. [This] is what the cognitive [brain] can manage … the subconscious brain can gather about four hundred billion bits of information per second. (Cedric Bertelli)

The conscious mind, so as not to overload us, filters information down into a much smaller portion so that we can function without being overwhelmed.

Therefore, when we experience trauma and the prefrontal cortex shuts down for half a second or more, we experience that heightened sense of experiencing life because the prefrontal cortex is not active to filter out sensations, emotions, or physical feelings.

In essence, during high stress or trauma, we feel everything fully in an absolute and illogical way.

When our body finds itself in a situation where the subconscious mind recognizes one or several elements that were present during one of our traumas, our subconscious mind is going to instantly generate the physical sensations that [it expects] we are about to feel based on what was felt at the moment of the corresponding trauma. (Cedric Bertelli)

An emotion always starts with a physical sensation in the body, and it is a prediction. When we feel a stressful emotion, we develop coping mechanisms to shut down the prediction to ignore feeling the emotion in our body.

Why must you feel your emotions?

Every time we control our emotions, we are informing the brain that we are about to face danger … because we take control … for a prediction to update, the key is really to do nothing. (Cedric Bertelli)

If you take control every time your brain or body predicts stress, you are informing your brain that the prediction is true because you are taking control.

You must feel your emotions, and do nothing, so that your brain can learn that this prediction is not always correct and will be updated.

Useful links:

Meet Billy Eldridge

billy-eldridge

Meet Billy, the resident beta male. For Billy, this is a place to hang out with other beta males and the people who love them. We’re redefining what beta males look like in the world. I have learned to embrace my best beta self, and I can help you to do the same. As a therapist, I understand the need to belong. You belong here. Join the REVOLUTION.

 

Meet Brandy Eldridge

brandy-eldridge

Hello, Beta friends. I am an alpha personality who is embracing the beta way of life. I feel alive when connected with people, whether that is listening to their stories or learning about their passions. Forget small talk, let’s go deep together. Come to the table and let’s have some life-changing conversations.

 

Thanks for listening!

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Podcast Transcription

[BILLY ELDRIDGE]
Hello, and welcome to Beta Male Revolution podcast, a podcast that started out by seeing the world through a different lens of masculinity, and now has become a place for people to deconstruct their shit in the second half life. I’m Billy Eldridge.
[BRANDY ELDRIDGE]
I’m Brandy Eldridge and as a married couple, we’ve had a ton of disagreements, tried to be honest about challenges and setbacks and hopes of becoming better versions of ourselves. So grab a cup of coffee, come hang out, let’s chat a little bit like we’ve known each other for 20 years.
[BILLY]
That’s what I’m talking about. Let’s get jaggy with it.
[BRANDY]
No?
[BILLY]
What?
[BRANDY]
No.
[BILLY]
Hello guys. We’ve got Cedric Bertelli with us today. Hey, Cedric.
[CEDRIC BERTELLI]
Hello. Hello, Billy. Hello, Brandy. Thank you so much for having me on the show.
[BRANDY]
I’m so excited. You’re here today. Billy is a counselor, but I’m pretty emotional with a lot of dysfunction, so you’re right, we’re excited to have you. You’re right at home. I need a lot of help.
[BILLY]
I’ve learned at this point in this work, you got to keep your hands and your mouth off your family because you’re too close to the issue to work on theirs. We’re always looking for ways to improve our lives and well just because I do that work for a living doesn’t mean I’m a know all and be all and end all. There’s so much stuff out there I haven’t even tapped into, but I began to read your work. So could you just tell us about, tell us your story and what you do.
[CEDRIC]
Well, I’m from France originally. I came in the US in 2003 for the first time. My first career was in hospitality business. I was working for the Ritz Garden up until 2009. I was working in the restaurants for them and I suffered, we can say so, I don’t know if suffer is the right word, but I felt a lot of anxiety, depression and anger toward my, the first part of my life for as long as I can remember, even as a little kid and for no logical particular reason. I come from a very loving family, no trauma, so to speak that I can think of, but it seemed that that came on very early on for me and all my life I was trying to find a way. I’ve been trying to find a way to feel better like you and Brandy.

We always try to feel better and to be a better guy and a better leader for my team as well. Through looking at solutions, I started to be interested in emotional functioning, so specifically how the brain construct emotion, because I thought if we understand how the brain construct emotion, then eventually we can understand how the brain can deconstruct emotion. From 2009 on, I started to study that, the human emotional functioning, came back in the US in 2011 and started to teach how to resolve emotional difficulties into the body, tapping into the interception, into the physical sensations.

I’ve been doing that since then in 2019. I founded the Emotional Health Institute together with two doctors, three therapists, a veterinarian, and methodologist as we are using farm animals to understand better mammals’ emotional functioning. What we’re doing is we are developing protocols, we call that EmRes™, for emotional resolution that allows the body to resolve disruptive emotional pattern, the most natural way, the most respectful way, and also the most gentle way as we can. Yes, that’s it.
[BILLY]
Man, well, so a large portion of our audience, I guess that are listening out there, they want to get straight to the point in the relief, but there is a small segment because I am of counselor of counselors who listen. So they’re going to want to know where’s the science, where’s the backing, where’s the data, who does this come from? So when you said you went back to France, who did you study under? Where does this come from, emotional resolution, EmRes™?
[CEDRIC]
Perfect. That’s a great question. So EmRes™ was initiated in France by a physical therapist at first. His name is G.G Godo. Now G.G Collaborates with us. He lives in a small island next to Madagascar, a French island called the Martin. It all started because G.G Was a physical therapist in the country, in the French country working with people mostly with farmers. He noticed that farmers, I don’t know if it’s the same in the US, but in France, they’re pretty, they’re not really open to talk about their life and et cetera, but you know that without having them to speak much, when an emotion was coming through the conversation or through their work as a physical therapist, they started to notice by simply asking the farmer, asking his clients to follow the sensations, linked to the emotion, simply without doing anything else. The emotion and the farmer or the person was referring to or undergoing was going away and not only going away for the session, but going away period as he was seeing his clients repeatedly.

That’s always start, it started with a fact notice that physical sensations when they followed in a specific wave without interfering with them, whatsoever, during an emotion of the capacity to integrate an emotion. So that’s where it started. Then we started to research on why, why is that happening? How is that happening? For me, a big click was the work of Lisa Feldman Barrett. I don’t know if you know the book, How Emotions Are Made. Barrett was in Boston, she’s a neuroscientist and I think she’s a psychotherapist, a psychologist as well. Her work has been really groundbreaking for me as she explains how emotio1ns are made and how emotions are made is quite simple.

Emotional difficulties, specifically emotions in general, but disruptive emotional pattern as we call them are obseprediction from the brain. An emotion that keeps on coming back is a prediction from the brain. Now in our life, we update prediction constantly. That’s how we learn. We have new elements, new conversation, and we update our prediction. That’s how we grow. It seemed that emotional difficulties are the same prediction, but that has not been updated. That keeps on coming back. So why is that? How can we update the prediction? It’s actually simple. Of course, emotional functioning is complex. I mean there’s ton of people writing brilliantly on that, Antonio Damasio, Feldman, Barrett, I mean, tons of people. And we only know as much as we know today, but this is what I understand about emotion right now. Can I go with it? Is that okay?
[BRANDY]
Yes.
[BILLY]
Yes, absolutely. So we know today that at the origin of every single one of our disruptive emotional pattern, depression, anxiety, stress, anger, phobia, anything that keeps on coming back, at the origin of those patterns is always the same event. It is always a moment, an instant of very high stress. So some of us will call it a trauma. I try to avoid to use the word trauma because this moment of very high stress can be seen as not traumatic for us adult. Now for a baby, a newborn, a child, those moments of very high stress can be definitely traumatic.

Basically for me, a moment of very high stress is a moment that hold tumor stress for the person to be taken on, to take on the stress. That would be different for, depending on our age, it would be different depending of our environment, about our personality, but at the origin of every single one of our pattern is a moment of very intense stress. Now, what is happening during this moment of a very intense stress, when the body cannot take the amount of stress held by the situation, there is a moment of short dissociation, meaning that the cognitive shutdown, maybe for half a second, maybe for 10th of a second, maybe for longer.

Now, what you and, I guess, we are aware of consciously cognitively that represent about 2000 bits of data of information per second. So that’s what the cognitive is able to manage. 2000 bits of information per second. The subconscious brain, a subconscious mind can gather about 400 billion bits of information per second. So basically the prefrontal cortex does a lot of things, but one of the thing that it does is it is used as a filter. We could not leave of this conversation or halter job if we were constantly bombarded by 400 billion bits of information per second.

Now, when we leave one of our stressful event, one of our trauma, the conscious mind shut down for just few seconds. It’s a normal defense mechanism that allow us not to suffer too much, but the subconscious mind is going to record everything that is happening during this moment of dissociation. The subconscious mind is going to record all the ailment that can be gathered via other five senses and also what we’re feeling in our body, the physical sensations felt in our body at the moment of this “trauma.” But not in a logical way. In an absolute unlogical way, the super subconscious mind is going to take a smell or shape, a temperature, a texture, all bits of information non-linear.

Now one of the main job of our subconscious mind, all through our life is to predict. We don’t respond or react as much as we’re predicting. For example when we are about to bite an apple, right before we bite an apple, we don’t have enough to buy the apple. Before we buy the apple, our brain, our body is predicting the experience that we are about to live. I’m sure you notice that for the food that you love. Basically, we don’t need to eat something twice. When we’re about to do it, the brain is already predicting what we’re about to experience. That’s the same process for many, many things in our life.

It is the same thing. It is the same thing for emotion you see. After we leave those moments of trauma and right now, with the experience that I have, I think that we live, we experience hundreds of those moments of trauma from the moment that we are born, maybe even before, I think, for sure before until we die. We’ll live this moment of trauma several times. I mean really hundreds, I think. But anyway, once we live this moment of trauma, doesn’t matter how all we are. Later on when we find ourself in a situation, no one should say when our body find itself in a situation where the subconscious mind recognizes one or several ailments that were present during one of our trauma, our subconscious mind is going to instantly generate the physical sensations that we are about to feel based on what was felt at the moment of the corresponding trauma.

Those physical sensations, we call that interception, basically interception or the physical sensation that we feel, letting us know how we feel, hungry, thirsty, horny, but also angry, depressed, jealous. We know that we feel an emotion because we feel physical sensation. An emotion, always start with a set of physical sensations. In the case of disruptive emotional pattern, the physical sensation that we feel in our body letting us know that we feel an emotion are the same physical sensations that were felt at the moment of the original trauma. It is a prediction. Now you see, the problem is when we feel an emotion we developed, I mean, from the moment that we are a little child up until now, we developed tone of coping mechanism to shut down this prediction.

When we feel the emotion, either we trained to deal with or create the emotion, or we train to shut down the emotion by breathing, by training to understand, by intellectualizing. Basically every time we feel a disrupt emotional pattern, we do not let the prediction run its course until the end. We always stay control one way or another, often subconsciously. The problem in doing that is every time we control our emotion, we are showing or informing the brain, so to speak that we are about to face a danger. We must be able, about to face a danger because we take control. What we found with EmRes™ is in order for prediction to update, the key is really to do nothing, to literally do nothing.

When I say do nothing, it’s an action because for human being, asking a human being to don’t do anything, to not do anything is extremely complicated. We’re going to go in our mind. We’re going to start breathing, stretching making sound or whatever. No, no, we need to consciously do nothing. We need to remain with the physiological prediction until the physiological prediction is done. Basically, when we feel an emotion, it is our body bracing for danger. It is our body expecting a danger to come our way. If we can remain with the prediction without impacting our environment or without impacting the prediction, the brain realizes that at the end of the prediction, when danger was supposed to arrive or to reach us, nothing is happening. From that very second, the prediction is updated and the emotional difficulty we were encountering will not come back. That’s it?
[BILLY]
Wow. Just that, that was so much information you packed in such a short amount of time there. I don’t know that I’ve ever heard it put so concisely just the way the body responds to trauma. I’m going to ask you a series of questions, like, so I have a personal issue I haven’t been able to overcome. I want to know what EmRes™ is appropriate for not appropriate for or does it work better for some things than others? So I’m assuming like, I’ve got this childhood phobia that has been with me for a long time. I’m a therapist. I’ve been to a lot of therapists. I’ve overcome a lot of anxiety and panic in my life, but I’ve got one thing that just won’t let go of me for the life of me.

A lot of times my anxiety is associated with claustrophobia and I used to not be able to go to a lot of places, but I can go to many places now I used to not be able to. I can publicly speak where I could never do that before, but elevators, I have a hard time. Almost, if it’s not impossible, I’ll take the stairs if given. I have such a body response and a fear reaction before I get on an elevator. Most of the time I turn and walk away. I don’t, I’m just yet to be able to get to a place where I feel like I’ve overcome that fear. Would EmRes™ be something appropriate for that?
[CEDRIC]
Yes, absolutely. It would be very appropriate. I would say, yes, we can definitely resolve that. That’s not a problem. I think EmRes™ is appropriate for any disruptive emotional pattern that we can name them such as phobia or sometimes we fit in a funk. Sometimes I know I have clients that during fall, they’re in a funk. They don’t know why, but they feel depressed, low energy. Anything that comes back can be resolved. Emotions do not make any sense. That’s one of the point we have as human beings. We love to make sense of everything. That’s a way for us to control and make us feel safe. But trying to understand an emotion will rarely make the emotion resolved. So yes, definitely this thing can be can be resolved. Yes, no problem.
[BRANDY]
So Cedric, you are giving information for everyone. Like that’s, I’m trying to work out who this doesn’t, who doesn’t need to hear this, but it feels like everyone needs to hear this because it can be any disruptive pattern. I just wanted to summarize and see if I’m getting this correct. So the brain is taking in all this information, it goes on overload, we predict that we are going to have this emotional reaction. What you’re saying is through this practice that you teach, you can calm yourself or sit with the emotion long enough to where the emotion goes away and it doesn’t disrupt any type of behavior.
[CEDRIC]
Correct.
[BRANDY]
Okay. So anything, my daughter has panic attacks. This would be something for that. I get angry when my husband chews too loud. This could help with that. Like even small things to the big things.
[CEDRIC]
Yes.
[BILLY]
And I get defensive when she gets angry at me chewing too loud and I get angry. We went through this deal today where that actually happened. She was like, you’re chewing and I can hear it. She has this auditory thing where it bothers her. But I have this defensive thing where I feel like I’m getting on, I’m being gotten onto. But then I realize as a kid, I bounced my leg a lot and I couldn’t control it. My dad used to get onto me for that or my mom would be like, don’t bounce your leg. I felt like I didn’t have any control over it. I was getting in trouble for it. Then I realized as an adult, I felt like I was being gotten onto for something that I couldn’t control. I was going to keep making the mistake and I got defensive and angry. So we had this interaction we had to work through, but you’re saying this can be a life hack for some of these things that get in the way.
[CEDRIC]
Yes, absolutely. For me, EmRes™ is not even a technique. It’s a way of life. It’s when you hear Billy chewing, like even before telling Billy to not chew so loud, I mean, come on. Don’t chew so loud. Before you tell him to not chew so loud is okay, let’s look inside and resolve what’s happening. We are quick to try to control what’s happening around us. So we feel better. We spend a large part of our life doing things so we feel better. We teach here in San to in schools and we taught about over 200 teachers to do this work with kids. We noticed, and the only time the teacher is doing this work, EmRes™, emotional resolution with kids is when they are disturbed, the teacher by the kids’ behavior and most of the time is too late.

Teachers will do EmRes™ on the child when the child is having a tantrum, but that’s too late, man. It’s too late. We have this tendency as adults, at least to take care of others when we are impacted by others. So the key, I think with EmRes™ is to, when we feel in a funk, when we feel an emotional difficulty, before doing anything, to go inside and listen to the body and allow the body to know this and whatever is triggering us is not actually a danger. With EmRes™, what we’re trying to do here is not to shut down emotion. To the contrary, the whole perspective on EmRes™ is to allowing the person to feel the emotions held by the moment that we are living. Most of the time, we feel emotions, not congruently with what we are experiencing in life. We feel emotion based on past wounds, past experiences. So the key of EmRes™ is okay, what emotion pragmatically can be experienced in the moment that I’m living now?
[BRANDY]
Okay, so negative and positive. We’re talking about negative emotions and negative disruptive patterns, but I don’t understand if we’re doing this work, how does this, does this impact the positive emotions?
[CEDRIC]
I think the positive emotion are not impacted. They become more skin dip. There’s no effect on positive emotion if not that we are going to feel them more often instead of anxiety instead of something else. I often take the example of a guy who was dating a girl, maybe the third date and the date, when he finally can kiss her. If he feels good, if he’s right, if he has no previous wounding so to speak, wow, he’s going to be excited to have the opportunity to kiss this girl and be connected to the intimacy of the moment, et cetera. That’s what can happen if everything is okay. But if that gentleman had difficult experiences before, or all he can think is anxious and nervous at the moment to kiss this girl is going to miss the whole beauty of that moment.
[BILLY]
So it brings people really into, when we talk about mindfulness and being in the here and now, a lot of times we can’t be in the here and now because we’re caught up in our head and we’re worried about the, what if, what if this happens? What if this fear comes true? What if this? We miss all these moments in our life because we’re wound up on the inside. So this helps to diffuse some of that, regulate it so we can actually live our lives in the only moments we have, which are right here right now, correct?
[CEDRIC]
Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. We can be present to what’s happening now and stop reacting or predicting from our past our past hurt.
[BRANDY]
I wanted to go back, you had talked about being more proactive in it. So you were saying like, with children, the teachers that are using it, that once the child is having the temper tantrums, it’s almost too late. So you begin to teach this work to them and they work with the students, for the students to be able to begin to regulate their own emotions. Is that correct? Did I hear that correctly?
[CEDRIC]
Yes, absolutely. That’s correct. We have a program working with parents, educators, and working with kids as well. That’s really the idea. The idea is to help kids create awareness of when they don’t feel, whether they don’t feel well, but not only the big emotions, the small shutdown, the small shyness, the small frustrations. Usually a tantrum is an accumulation of all that. So the idea is to, well, teach the kids that it’s okay to feel an emotion. It’s okay to feel shy. It’s okay to feel stressed, but when you feel it, take the time to connect with it. Where do you feel that in your body? So teaching the kid to resolve the emotional difficulties little by little so they don’t reach a moment of tantrum of crisis.
[BILLY]
I know you went into the depths of why this works, why it works in the brain, what our body’s doing. A lot of people might not be as interested in that as I am. I go, I nerd out on stuff like that but if they’re just struggling and looking for hope, looking for relief from emotional pain, how hard is this to grasp? Is it tangible for the everyday person? I mean, that’s our ideas in academia and stuff gets so lofty, and it’s like, you have to have a Ph.D. to understand anything, or you have to be a clinician to hold the, but handing and what I hear you, you’re handing this to people, kids in schools, moms, dads, people. You’re empowering them. This is something they can do. This is something they can learn. Am I correct? How hard is it to grasp what you teach?
[CEDRIC]
It’s extremely simple. We have people working in the background on the research, as a research going on right now in clinical research done in France. We’re having some paper hopefully that will get published soon. So we have people working on the neuroscience behind it and being published because of course, people feel more secure to have this material and we need to provide it. Now, when it comes down to the actual matter and to do the resolution, it is extremely simple. It is so simple than people, when you tell them how to do it, they will not do it. It’s so human. My grandfather is 98 years old, and I guarantee you that he has been doing that his whole life. What I’m trying to teach people, he has been train, he has been doing it his whole life.

It is not magical. It is not rocket science. It is just a fact when we feel an emotion, instead of blaming, instead of trying to understand why, to stop and take ownership of the emotion. It’s definitely not our fault that we feel that way but when it becomes, when we realize that it’s our emotion and we take it for such, we become completely empowered to resolve it. It doesn’t matter if I don’t like big people, because I was bullied as a kid. It doesn’t matter. It happened. It happened. Trauma happened and there’s nothing we can do about it. Now, if I own my emotion, now, I become active, active in my own healing. When I realize that I feel an emotion, all I’ve got to do is to make sure that I’m in a safe place, close my eyes and pay attention to my physical sensations. My actual physical sensations, not my chakra, not my, no, no.

What do I feel pragmatically in my body right now that make me realize that I’m upset and it’s going to be a tight throat, tight stomach, nausea, shaking legs. Literally, what is my interception? I feel an emotion. I make sure I’m safe. I close my eyes. I pay attention to at least two sensations at once. That’s really important. You’ve got to pay attention to two sensations at once. If you only pay attention to one sensation, chances are, you’re going to try to control it one way or another, and it’s not going to work. You pay attention to two sensations at once and from that moment, that’s the most difficult. You’ve got to do nothing.

That means that you don’t want to relax, you don’t want to take a breath, you don’t want to do anything other that to remain curious of what is happening in your body. This will take between two seconds and two minute maximum prediction. I never encountered a prediction that last longer than two minute, a sensorial prediction that is. At the end of the prediction when you’re able to stay with the physical sensations as they change, as they increase, as they abate, as long as you’re able to stay with the sensation for as long as they’re there at the end, you will feel calm, just physically calm. When you reach the spot it’s over. The prediction will be updated. EmRes™ is the art of doing nothing.
[BILLY]
Okay. This sounds scary simple.
[BRANDY]
But counter intuitive too, also to what we’ve been told. I mean, we’ve been told to have good emotions, you have to have bad emotions and to recognize the bad emotions, and you’re saying that to a sense, but you’re saying to sit with it and actually sit with it, and then your brain re-predicts or you reprogram your brain to not predict that emotion again.
[CEDRIC]
Correct.
[BRANDY]
This is fascinating. It’s just fascinating because it’s like you’re giving people, I mean, it’s, I can’t even put it into words. Like there go all the therapist jobs, like this is really important.
[BILLY]
Well, and I’m very for, I don’t like systems that set clinicians up as the heroes. I think the work of a clinician or a healer or anybody that works from either yoga to pastoral, to in a formal therapist chair, if there’re anything more than just a guide, and they’re not putting tools in the person’s hand to empower themselves and to find ways that they can be the hero of their own story, they’re not doing very good work. So what I hear you doing is you’re handing practical tools, putting people, putting things in their laps that they can pick up and they can use. So I want to make sure I hear what you’re telling me. So this thing that I’ve held onto for many years, and if you help me with this thing, I promise you, I’m going to be your biggest, I’m going to get the hat and the t-shirt and wear it everywhere and put it on my website because —
[CEDRIC]
No problem. I’d be happy to, of course.
[BILLY]
Yes, yes, yes. I’m going to, and when we get off here, I want some of what you’re selling because, but here’s the thing. I’ve had a lot of dashed hopes. I’ve had my hopes lifted up and that this thing could be fixed with this, but then only to crash back down. So it is with a little fear and trepidation. But I haven’t given up hope that there is an answer out there and maybe, just maybe today I found it. So we’ve talked about like my phobia and arguing with the wife and things but when we get bigger with the big T traumas, the really tough stuff, I deal with a lot of people who’ve just had some horrific childhood things happen and maybe is a way to deal with it. They’re cutting or they’re drinking or they sexually acting out and they know it’s bad for them, but they can’t quit. Can we go back and handle the big hitters too, that are really dark and tough if we can go there for just a second?
[CEDRIC]
Yes, yes, yes, absolutely. Absolutely. The subject of this work you see is we don’t have to bring our clients or in your case, our patient to relive, re-experience the split trauma. I think it’s contra-productive and it’s actually mean and dangerous. The way that we approach the big team, so to speak, the big trauma is simply by asking the client, how does that trauma impact your life today? A traumatic event, a rape, an aggression, a terrible childhood, an actual trauma, even if it’s a one time, action, let’s say one rape, most of the time it’s going to have several repercusion in our life. I never, no, I think I never encountered somebody who experienced a natural trauma, remembering it, and only has one ripple in their life from that trauma. It doesn’t happen that way, not in my experience.

So the way that we approach it is today in your life, what are the repercussions of this trauma? We are going to list with the client in all honesty, all simplicity how do they see the trauma impacting their life today? It can be flashback. It can be a agoraphobia. It can be, I don’t know, not being able to be in a relationship, performance anxiety. We just put on the table all the way the trauma is impacting their life, and we’re going to resolve those emotions in their current life one after another, starting from current situation. At no point, we have to talk about the trauma if they don’t want to. We only and always take the individual the way they are experiencing life today, because the way they experience life today, the physical sensations present today in their emotions, in their current emotion, were the physical sensations that were felt in their body at the moment of the trauma.

So the way that we experience emotions today, doesn’t matter when the trauma happened. It doesn’t matter if we ever remember the trauma. The way that we fit in our body in the moment of these emotions is like a vortex in time. It’s a vortex leading us directly to the moment of the trauma, but not through cognitive memory, only through sensorial memory. It’s a bit like if our body hold our whole history, but not through image imagery, most of the time, no, through physical sensations through tensions. So yes, we can work with a big trauma, but we only work with a person from the current life, the current perspective on life today.
[BRANDY]
I could listen to you talk for hours one, because your voice is smooth and soothing but also because I feel like you’re offering something to the world that we need. I feel like you’re offering hope for a lot of people that feel hopeless and stuck, or like you said, in a funk. My big takeaway from one thing that you said earlier is that we react when we’re being inconvenienced by others’ emotions or others doing things that make us react emotionally. I think that you’re offering us a technique, a tool to stay grounded, no matter what’s going on around us. That just sounds like relief that everyone could use. I’m just simply in awe of this. So I do want Billy to go through it. I feel like for our audience after, however many sessions you do or whatever the protocol is for it, we’d love to have you back on and check back in with us, if that would be something you’d be willing to do.
[CEDRIC]
Yes, absolutely. Absolutely, with pleasure, with pleasure.
[BILLY]
Absolutely. I’m all about putting my stuff out there and just if something works and if me going through a process and showing people and helping them get over their fear of trying something out. If I can jump out there and do it and jump in the cold water and say, hey, it’s okay, it’s like a whim reference there in the cold water. No pun intended and just do something that might help another person and say, “Well, Billy did it. It worked for him.” I would never offer anything to our people that I hadn’t tried myself and that I didn’t benefit from. So this is going to be a great experience and experiment. I can’t wait to meet with you. I could just, I don’t know what it is, in your voice, in your heart. I feel I’m just going to go out on a limb. I feel authenticity. I feel you’re easy to trust. So I’m going in and I can’t wait to fall back up and let people know how my experience was with EmRes™ and maybe Brandy and I can help you get the word out there on what that you have to offer.
[CEDRIC]
That’d be fantastic.
[BRANDY]
Cedric, thank you.
[CEDRIC]
My pleasure. I was saying it would be fantastic and yes, I’m looking very much looking forward to do a session with you. And yes, I think a big part of my work is to demystify emotion. So then people are not afraid of them and realize that it’s just something that can be resolved the same way that when we cut ourself, the body can heal. It’s the same thing with emotions, except that it happens much faster.
[BRANDY]
Wow. Thank you. We look forward to speaking with you again and thank you for the work that you’re doing.
[BILLY]
Thank you so much, Cedric.
[CEDRIC]
Thank you two.
[BILLY]
I want to ask this really quick and I know we’ll say it on the front end, but where can people find you on the internet?
[CEDRIC]
So the best way is to go to the main website, which is emotionalhealthinstitute.org.
[BILLY]
All right. Well, fantastic. We’ve got that down and we’ll put that in our show notes. Thanks so much. You have a beautiful day.
[CEDRIC]
You as well, guys. Thank you so much for the opportunity.
[BILLY]
Beta Male Revolution is part of the Practice of the Practice podcast network, a family of podcasts seeking to change the world. To hear other podcasts like the Bomb Mom Podcast, Imperfect Thriving or Empowered and Unapologetic, go to practiceofthepractice.com/network.

This podcast is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regards to the subject matter covered. This is given with the understanding that neither the host, Practice of the Practice, or the guests are providing legal, mental health, or other professional information. If you need a professional, you should find one.

Beta Male Revolution is part of the Practice of the Practice Podcast Network, a network of podcasts seeking to help you thrive, imperfectly. To hear other podcasts like the Bomb Mom Podcast, Imperfect Thriving, or Empowered and Unapologetic, go to practiceofthepractice.com/network.

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